Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Wednesday, October 29, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
God love ya Cloris, you given us quite a few laughs over the past 60 years, and none more so than the last couple of weeks... but as I said earlier today... it's time the comic relief was relived.
Today we are going to predict the next three stars voted of Dancing with the Stars.
Tonight, Cloris Leachman will be going home.
Next week, La Lucci will going home.
In two weeks, Maurice Green will be going home.
That is all.
Monday, October 27, 2008
This is one of the most stupid senseless things I've heard of lately among an ever growing list of inane news reports.
I feel sorry for the little boy, and while I should feel sorry for his parents I am not. That this will have destroyed their lives fails miserably at coming close to the loss of the boy.
Sunday, October 26, 2008
Saturday, October 25, 2008
A video a day of some fun spooky goodness!
- - - - -
Little Shop of Horrors - the Dentist Song
It's his professionalism I respect.
Thursday, October 23, 2008
Seems the Obama and McCain camps are focusing too much attention on just Joe the Plumber...
...and Joe Six-Pack...
...and forgetting too many other Joes.
So in the interest of fair-play, here is a short list of other Famous Joes you should be targeting for your vote:
And the lets not forget the "Pink Vote"...
...and most important of them all The Notorious J*O*E (Joe*to*Hell) ...
...Did I forget anyone?
What was interesting was that they were both digging through and sorting the contents of a single purse. I found this rather odd and so I just had to watch, when all of the sudden Hobbitina #1 takes a piece of paper out of the purse and throws it on the ground, while there was a trash can not 3 feet away to her left.
Instantly I am Pissed.
I bend over, pick up the piece of paper, tap H#1 on the shoulder and say, in my SWEETEST voice, "I believe this is yours. Seems you accidentally drooped it." She looks at me, gives a skanky smile and takes the piece of paper, looks at Hobbitina #2, then back to me and says, "No I didn't assadentally drop it, I threw it away." Then proceeds to throw it back on the ground, turns back to H#2 and laughs.
I bend down, pick it back up and hand it back to her saying, a skotch less sweetly, "Hmmm that's interesting because I was certain it must have accidentally fallen because if you had meant to dispose of it, you'd have used the trash can right beside you."
She takes the paper and throws it on the ground again saying 'I don't see that it concerns you, now piss off!" H#2 giggles nervously now.
Oh no she di'ent!
I picked it back again and said, "We can keep at this all day, but if you don't want to piss ME off more, you'll put the paper in the trash. Because, I'm not about to stop." and passed it back to her.
Hobbitina #2 who seems to be the Mensa member of the two of them, looks at me, then looks at H#1 and says, "Yea, Gina, maybe you should put it in the trash..."
Hobbitina #1 crumples the paper sighs and throws the paper in the trash and says, "Whatever."
I say "No. NOT whatever. God Damn Litter Bug!"
Strangely enough the hobbit girls are silent thereafter and oddly enough elect to wait for another bus.
- - - - -
I seem to be having a heavy flow week.
...you just can't!
This just in from the "Seriously, get a life" news dept...
Online divorcee kills virtual husband in cyber revenge.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Eating lots of food fast, makes you fat.
Gee, thanks for that...
Hopefully one day soon scientists can also unravel:
- the correlation between drinking lots of fluids and having to pee
- why eating glass causes internal bleeding
- the answer to: 2 + 2 =
- the Caramilk secret
- why anyone voted for Steven Harper
Tuesday, October 21, 2008
Some interesting Gay Porn Star Names...
Hank Hightower a.k.a. Hank Tower
Jens Hammer a.k.a. Jens "Turboslut" Hammer,
My Porno Name is Dick "Hanger" Fecherholrawski.
Take The Porn Star Name Generator!
First we will say that she only made 10,000 prank calls. (Not one more or less.)
She would be sent to prison for a period equal in days to the number of calls made: 10,000 days or in other terms roughly 27 years, 5 months (give or take a day)
Further she will have to wear at all times a cell phone that receives ONLY incoming calls, and must answer every call within 4 rings or else receive an electrical shock that would stun but not cause any permanent damage. She would then have to remain on that call for a minimum of 90 seconds. (for every missed call an additional 5 seconds would be added to the minimum time required to remain on the line). Any call that she disconnected from would also give a shock and add 5 seconds to the minimum time required to remain on the line) - no time would be added if the call was disconnected form the originating caller.
The number associated to her phone would be given to each and every telemarketing company, sales department of newspapers, paving - roofing - carpet cleaning company etc. She would not be able to decline any incoming call and would only be able to answer questions with an automated, pre-recorded "Yes, please continue" reply.
Eligibility for parole would only be possible after half of the time served, AND if it were found that she would no longer to be a high risk of re-offending.
After release, any further single instance of prank calling would result in a repeat of the full initial sentence with NO chance of parole.
Judge Kitty has spoken.
I get to bitch becauseIi voted and it wasn't for HIM.
If you didn't vote, or you DID vote and it was for THEM, then I guess you can just shut the hell up for the next, what?.. 2-3 years? til another illegal election is called.
Monday, October 20, 2008
Mr. Blackwell has passed on and he's looking for you.
Among some of his best zingers are:
Madonna: "The Bare-Bottomed Bore of Babylon."
Barbra Streisand: "She looks like a masculine Bride of Frankenstein." (My FAV)
Meryl Streep: "She looks like a gypsy abandoned by a caravan."
Patti Davis: "Packs all the glamour of an old, worn-out sneaker."
Ann Margret: "A Hells Angel escapee who invaded the Ziegfeld Follies on a rainy night."
Camilla Parker-Bowles: "The Duchess of Dowdy."
Bjork: "She dances in the dark - and dresses there, too."
Britney Spears: "Her bra-topped collection of Madonna rejects are pure fashion overkill."
Sunday, October 19, 2008
God luv 'em they're a pile of nut jobs from the get go. I love them dearly, but sweet mother mary, jesus hanging on a cross, they do try the patience.
My Mom and Dad as you may or may not know were up visiting me and Didier since last Sunday and left yesterday. It was a great visit. A fantastic visit - in that it happened at all, as this was their 4th attempt in 17 years to come visit, and only just, were they able to come, due to my Father's health - The Doctors only granting permission for him to travel the Thursday afternoon before they left on come up two days later.
But they DID arrive and health crises or not they were bound and determined to have a full visit. And so they did:
After arriving and 'freshening up' we went fpr a ride around the city, picked up some Bagels at Fairmount Bakery, then had brunch at Coras, then drove up the mountain, stooped at the belvedere looking east towards the Olympic Stadium...
...then to Beaver lake and a short walk to the Main Belvedere...
... over looking downtown. Then off to St-Joseph's Oratory...
... and a 2 hour visit inside and out, then a quick tour of Westmount to see how the obnoxiously rich live. Finally we made it home and relaxed.
Hello, all we did was eat!
We took another tour around the city and headed to Old Montréal. We went to Notre Dame Basilica...
... and then Noël...
...the Christmas store near by. (you'll soon see this would becomse a trend)Walked around the cobbled streets a bit and chowed down at les Trois Brasseurs. Walked along some more heading to Place Jacques Cartier, and Hotel de Ville...
... and the law courts and then jumped back in the car and headed east to the Botanical Gardens...
...We toured the Green Houses (well most of then at any rate. They were renovating one - which then blocked access to 2 others... my favourite two: the Orchid Room and the Fern Room... the Bastards!) We toured the seasonal exhibit of the Pumpkin room where schools all over the city submit decorated pumpkins. I'll tell you this, kids have amazingly creative minds given the chance. The best were Shrek and Fiona...
...some penguins (made from gourds)...
... and the M+M guys...
...Very cute! Hell there were even a few with Leopard Print!!!
...Then we headed out side...
...walked through what remained of the roses and the rose garden and made our way to the Chinese Pavilion where the annual Chinese Lantern exhibit was...
Always incredible. Always breathtaking.
It succeeded again this year. After than a quick run out to Trudeau Airport to pick up a rent-a-car from a friend and then home, exhausted and beat we all slumped on the sofa.
After breakfast we all filled into the Audi A4 Quattro and made our way to Québec City. After parking the car we took a short walk down to le Restaurant Aux Anciennes Canadiens...
... and had a terrific meal, then with our bellies full went walking around the city...
...for the next 3 hours. After checking into our hotel rooms we rested a bit then went out shopping again, to another Christmas shop: La Boutique du Noël...
...and then stopped into a small Crepe resto for a late dinner, and then made our way back to the hotel and passes out.
After another incredible breakfast, we packed the car and went shopping AGAIN! - to yet ANOTHER Christmas shop even! Le Royaume du Père Noël...
...took one last quick tour of the city and river and made our way further east to Sainte-Anne-de-Beaupré...
After an hour or so in the church (and gift shop) we grabbed as bite to eat in a small diner and started our return drive to Montréal, but not before stopping off at les Chutes de Montmorecy. The trees all along or drive, both to and from Québec City were beautiful, but one you added in the falls well then the scene was complete. We took the cable car...
...to the top and walked along the hanging boardwalk to the top of the falls...
...took a few more pics and then made our way back down to the bottom. Back in Montreal 3 hours later we all ate some leftover turkey and passed out on the sofa, or more cleverly (well only Didier) went to bed!
Another bit of a relaxing day. We were all so tired. We took it easy, going only for a short walk in the gaybourhood. And after Dinner we went to the Olympia Theatre to see a show... "The Best of Broadway" It was a song and dance spectacular with songs from Musicals old and new, going back to 42 nd Street right up to Mamma Mia and everything in-between. When Didier and I bought the tickets last month we figured it would be an enjoyable evening out, but personally I was not expecting that much. Was I ever pleasantly amazed. The show was nearly 2 hours of non-stop song and dance and just kept getting bigger and better as it went. My only disappointment was that they did not do anything from The Sound of Music... but then no one is perfect, so I forgave them. And the beauty of the night was, after the show we were only a short 5 block walk from home.
We all slept in a bit. I made my famous blueberry pancakes and then Mom and Dad were packing packing packing. Dad went out for a little last minute sightseeing and picture taking (alone, in the village... - I shudder to think what he took pics of - while at home Mom and I were frantically wrapping Christmas gifts... her wrapping things to stay here for me and Didier and I wrapping items for them to take home. By early afternoon we were packing the car with their luggage, heading back to Fairmount Bagel...
...to get some yummy goodness for them to take home and then we were at the train station...
...waiting in line for them to register their sleeper cars for the return home.
It was a whirlwind visit. I love that they were here, I love that they are gone and I love that they are already planning a return visit.
Ya gotta love 'em.