Observations from underground (the Metro):

- Cut in front of me to get one of the few seats available and I WILL trip you. And then smile down at you when you look up at me while I take the seat perfectly designed to cush my tush.

- If you wear a FUR COAT and have more gold and diamonds on your fingers and ears than a Rapper, then you DO NOT BELONG on the metro. And DON’T be surprised when the 15 year old girl in head to to pink camo with a nose ring and black dyed hair and more eyeliner than Amy Winehouse refuses to give you the seat she’s been sitting in for 7 metro stops already. Bitch!

- There’s a lot of woofy yumminess riding the metro during rush hour. You could get whiplash looking around. …Which is about the ONLY good reason I could ever have for getting a cell phone… to clandestinely take their pics to show you what I’m talking about.

Observations from Snowy Street level:

- If you wear sneakers in the WINTER, when it’s SNOWING and the roads and sidewalks are SLIPPERY and you fall FOUR times within ½ a block, you have no one to blame but yourself. Don’t blame the city. I might also add you look like a total knob with no gloves or hat on either …but THANK YOU ever so for the entertainment you give.

- The next bum you walk past on the street talking loudly as if he’s carrying on a conversation you only hear ½ of (the other ½ in his head); you’re probably wrong -as I was this morning- No it’s just a slovenly dressed individual talking into his blue-tooth. Whish is one of the many reasons why I won’t get a cell phone… enough people already think I’m a crazy person.

- I love the sound snow makes when you’re walking in it.