Fucked up weather reporting

Is it just me?

Am I the only one who's more than tired by how phenomenally inaccurate the weather forecasting has become lately?! It seems to me that as technology increases, accuracy decreases.

I can remember a time, when you watched the evening news and there was a dumb buxom blonde chick, in a too tight opened down to there blouse gave the weather report on the evening news that aside from confirming at even that early age that I was indeed going to be a card carrying member of the gAy-Team that the accuracy of the report was in around the 90% range. And this in a time when she had to write the temperatures on the map AND draw cute icons of things such as Rain, Cloud, Sun, Snow, Wind, Fog etc.

How is it that 20-25 years ago they could give 5 to 7 day ADVANCED forecasts that actually happened. Sure they were sometimes off by a couple degrees in the temperature and occasionally the "flurries' were more 'accumulative snow', or the 'showers' were just 'rain'; but by and large what they "forecast" was the weather we got.

Nowadays, with all the satellite images, Doppler and "accu-check' weather forecasting; they cannot even give you a clear report into the next day, let-alone the following 12 hours.

Seriously what virgin sacrificing, voo-doo, satanic, black magic shit was the weather forecasting industry into back then that they can't be doing now?!

The ONLY accuracy we get these days is basically when they say Sunny, me and Didier know that means at the VERY LEAST it's gonna be over-cast and depending on the time of year it also includes rain or snow... or BOTH!... If they predict Rain or Snow, break out the sun screen.

I really want to know... is there some sort of global conspiracy going on? Are all the Weather reports just in on some big collective joke? I really would like to know...

In the mean time if I'm gonna be fucked over by the weather I choose this impressive 'warm front'...



I can't help it, I DO like me some 'extreme weather'...

High on life... and glue.

I'm not sure if many of you, my dear, dear blog readers take the bus here in Montréal, but I'm gonna open this one up to everyone because, well, y'all amuse me...

For the past two week, an ever increasing number of the buses I am on (I take two a day, one in the morning and one on the return home) and of them well over half have REEKED to the high heaven of what I can only describe as heated model glue...

You know the glue I'm talking about...


It was in those little orange and white metal tubes for building plastic models of the Red Baron's plane, the Titanic, the General Lee and so on and so forth. You could get a good buzz off the stuff while using it legitimately... if you used it for more transcendental purposed you could really see some psychedelic shit.

While I don’t mind the odd little buzz, - ‘cause less face it, it makes the commute more tolerable – but this is not a subtle pear vanilla airwick air freshener here, it’s a mind numbing onslaught to the senses that after a few minutes goes from a mild psychotropic trip to a full on migraine and eye watering attack. I’ve sent 3 complaints to the STM so far but no reply… I live across from the CBC and down the street from CTV, I think I’m going to have to take it up a notch.



Seriously I arrived at work today feeling like I took a 5 minute bong hit, while mildly entertaining for those around me, I’m beginning to fear the amount of brain cells I’m losing while commuting to work.. and lets face it, I NEED those little grey fellas…

Quick question...

If less is more...

...then is nothing everything?

Quick Question...

Does anyone know where this "Lazy Fair" is that Mr. Harper mentioned tonight...



...cause I'd like to go.

I just don't get it....

I can't sleep. This is driving me mental. (ok MORE mental...) Why do the Pussycat Girls want to have boobies when they grow up?

I mean they're kinda cute, what with their blue feet and all, but seriously, what's up with that?!

Jeremy who?!

Well... It's all over for the season, and god knows WHEN the next season will begin... my guess is sometime near the next melennium...

Action-packed, and I don't mind saying they went very fast through a lot of plot. HOLY SHIYTE!

Only one question, well ok there are lots, but let's just start with... Jeremy WHO?! 'Splain please...

shoes

I'll give you a nickle...


... if you can tell me which shoes are N@'s and which shoes are Corn's.

Is this all that's left?

It would seems it's all been done, or at the very least we're really starting to scrape the bottom of the barrel... but a Musical by Stephen King and John Mellencamp?! Really?

---

Jerome, you best be working on something good right now! How's "Come Hell or High Water" coming along? ;-)

Hickory Smoked Métro?

I'm not sure if you're familiar with the Montréal Métro System, but there are a lot of smells in it...

...of course there's your standard smelly people, B-O, B-O-My-GOD, urine, generic cheap-ass drug-store counter perfume, eau-de-toilet (and I'm NOT talking the perfume variety here people) burning rubber and doritos.

There's one other smell you get allot as well and for some unknown reason that's the smell of a fire. Not a "run for your life, the metro train is on fire" type smell, but the "crackling, chalet, marshmallow toasty, chestnuts roasting over an open fire" type smell. And there's NEVER any smoke to explain and show the way.

To me at least, it's one of life's great mysteries, more compelling than the Caramilk Secret. And this morning on the commute to the office I could smell it all the way from Berri to Cremazie...

What the hell people? Are there C.H.U.D. living down there, in some long forgotten Métro tunnels roasting unaware Métro travellers for their dinner?

And why is there never any smoke? I know they say "Where there's smoke, there's fire", but what about when there's no smoke? Is it accepted that I can say "Where's there's the smell of smoke, there's fire"?!

I'm open to suggestions and explanations to the burning wood smell... it remains a mystery to me...

Anyone?
Anyone?
Bueller?

Clear-cut the airwaves

I may well be in the minority on this, but then again I may not be, but jeeze-louise am I sick of Timbaland. It seems that every second song on the radio is either Timbaland, or 'featuring' Timbaland... I'm sick of it. Well, in fact much of the music the past couple of months is giving me hives... but Timbaland in particular... aren't his 15 minutes just about up? In place of "Featuring Timbaland..." how I'd love to just hear TIMBER!!! ... which leads me to ask... if Timbaland falls in the forest, would there be a song about it? More importantly who'd be "featured"?

And while I'm on it; what the hell happened these last couple of years when now everything is featuring somebody or other. What happened to the good old days when Song X was sung by Singer Y or Z and that was it. Now it's all Song A, sung by Singer X, with Y and featuring Z ...

...When did BACK-UP SINGING become a FEATURE?!?

Why?

Can somebody tell me why this exists? Or more to the point, it's purpose.. other than making you scratch your head and ask people ... why?

Be honest.

Does this Blog make my ass look big?