Monday, June 29, 2009

Michael Who?

Over the weekend the viewer poll for Canada AM was as follows:

Who do you think is the biggest musical act of all time?

The results were as follows:

Michael Jackson: 11%




Elvis Presley: 44%




The Beatles: 45%

Friday, June 26, 2009

cockamAMY


Amy Winehouse-Jackson

Thursday, June 25, 2009

In other news...


6 Months to Christmas !

Quote of the week.

It's been a while... but this is just to good.

While emailing back and forth with N@ about the recent celbri-culling that's seems to be taking place, N@ said...

"Liz Taylor is going to lose her shit."



In rebuttle, Miss Taylor said...

"Glaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaadiator!"

hmmmm...

No offense to any of you that are actually saddened by this...


...but I wasn't aware he was still alive.

Michael Jackson
(August 29, 1958 - June 25, 2009)

From Charlie to God...

Heaven gains an Angel...

Farrah Fawcett
February 2, 1947 – June 25, 2009

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Separated at Birth... at Birth... at Birth...

It's not often my eyes catch these things, so that I have THREE to offer all at once is rather an amazing feat...

First and formost...

Recent Jailbird, Phil Spector and Transexual Transilvanian, Riff-Raff



Mado, Queen of all Drag Queens, and Helena Bonham-Carter as the Queen of Hearts



And finally... as was suggested by Daphne "Mitzi" Blake.. .

Misster-Kitty as a Kitten and Velma Dinkley, Lesbionic slooth from Scooby Doo


(Personally, I just don't see it)

Bon Fête $t-Jean

Call it what you want… Fête St-Jean, Fête du Québec, Fête Nationale
...I call it Fête du Cha-ching!

As all my clients are in Ontario and Vancouver it’s business as usual for me today, but thanks to les Norms du Travail du Québec I am MORE than financially compensated for the day.



So to one and all I wish you a very happy Fête $t-Jean.

Happy Hump Day

Monday, June 22, 2009

You can't spell Twitter without TWIT

I'm sure you've all heard about Perez Hilton's claims of being attacked by Black Eyed Peas' singer Will.I.Am and how TWICE he TWITTERED that he was attacked and that he needed help...

I am sure I am not the only person to now, more than ever consider him a total fucktard.

You 'claim' you've been attacked and that you're bleeding... and you have the time to post to your TWITTER account TWICE about the situation, including a request for help, but you're too fucktarded to call the cops on your own?! I am sure even the most adept texter would have taken some time to be able to text in both 'updates' as opposed to the what? 1/5 of a second to dial 9-1-1

I doubt that his claims are even true, but if they are, can I just say, "Thank you" to Will.I.Am or whomever took the time to bitchslap Perez and further request that he be a little more thoroughly next time and complete the task at hand by thinning the heard.

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Happy Father's Day!

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Fucked up weather reporting

Is it just me?

Am I the only one who's more than tired by how phenomenally inaccurate the weather forecasting has become lately?! It seems to me that as technology increases, accuracy decreases.

I can remember a time, when you watched the evening news and there was a dumb buxom blonde chick, in a too tight opened down to there blouse gave the weather report on the evening news that aside from confirming at even that early age that I was indeed going to be a card carrying member of the gAy-Team that the accuracy of the report was in around the 90% range. And this in a time when she had to write the temperatures on the map AND draw cute icons of things such as Rain, Cloud, Sun, Snow, Wind, Fog etc.

How is it that 20-25 years ago they could give 5 to 7 day ADVANCED forecasts that actually happened. Sure they were sometimes off by a couple degrees in the temperature and occasionally the "flurries' were more 'accumulative snow', or the 'showers' were just 'rain'; but by and large what they "forecast" was the weather we got.

Nowadays, with all the satellite images, Doppler and "accu-check' weather forecasting; they cannot even give you a clear report into the next day, let-alone the following 12 hours.

Seriously what virgin sacrificing, voo-doo, satanic, black magic shit was the weather forecasting industry into back then that they can't be doing now?!

The ONLY accuracy we get these days is basically when they say Sunny, me and Didier know that means at the VERY LEAST it's gonna be over-cast and depending on the time of year it also includes rain or snow... or BOTH!... If they predict Rain or Snow, break out the sun screen.

I really want to know... is there some sort of global conspiracy going on? Are all the Weather reports just in on some big collective joke? I really would like to know...

In the mean time if I'm gonna be fucked over by the weather I choose this impressive 'warm front'...



I can't help it, I DO like me some 'extreme weather'...

Friday, June 19, 2009

Happy Anniversary

Every dog has his day...

...and today's belongs to Santiago, who turns 2 years old today.



OK well we don't know for sure. We picked him up on Dec 19th from the SPCA and they said he was about one and a half, so we add six months and that brings us to today...

Feliz cumpleaños mi niño pequeño!

cockamAMY


Chihuahua Winehouse

Thursday, June 18, 2009

To the Heart of the Matter

I've talked about the Isotope crisis before, going back as far as Dec 2007 which we thought THEN was a crisis, but that was a walk in the park because it last just a month. Thus far the current crisis is 5 weeks in and will easily go, according to some report from 3 - 8 months. Other reports indicate it will go near a year.

I've mentioned it before and I'll do so again. Without viable and acceptable amounts of radioactive medical isotopes, people will go undiagnosed or at the very least undiagnosed in time. And it is conceivable due to this lack of timely diagnosis that people could die un-necessarily.

Case in point:

I was speaking to one of my clients today. She works in a clinic in metropolitan Toronto. When the shortage of isotopes began clinics and hospitals alike needed to cancel, or rather postpone some tests. In the case at this one clinic a gentleman's cardiac test was re-booked a week later.

Unfortunately when the day came for the rebooked test, there was not the necessary product available and so once again he was re-booked. The test was for this Tuesday.

He suffered a heart attack on Monday.

In this case the man was fortunate in that he survived. But even when you survive the damage can be irreversible.

I urge you to contact your MP, the Prime Minister, Health Minister, and demand that more be done to resolve this crisis. Immediately.

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Happy Hump Day

Everybody sing...


"Alice the Camel has gets one hump..."

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

iConfess


I'm not sure if this is a sin; OK I know it's NOT a sin... but I feel a little hypocritical about it.

If you know me, you'll know there are a few things I simply cannot abide:
-Stupid Stupid People
-Conservative Canadian Politicians
-Céline Dion's "One Heart"
-Litterbugs
-Inexplicable and or unnecessary smells
-asstard drivers
-Nosepickers in Public
-cell-phones in washrooms

...to name but a few. But, it is this last one that I find is causing me grief at the moment.

NO! I have not become a Toilet Telephoner, but recently while on the throne iTouch myself. Especially at work.

Let me explain... while on the throne I have been catching up on e-mail, FaceBook, LOLcats, blog reading and commenting or just playing solitaire (the CARD GAME you bunch of sickos) on my iTouch...

However... in the last couple of days I have been feeling conflicted about this new clandestine practice and feel I need to come clean on the subject.

Would you consider this the same as or similar to talking on the phone whilst on the john, or is this acceptable? And would you be offended if you received an email or blog post of FB comment from me while I was otherwise occupied? Cause, quite frankly I do this because work is so effing hectic it's about the only time I have...

So tell me dear Kittens... is this a sin?

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

The Sexification of Lisa Riatt

OK. I will go on record as saying I no longer wish cancer on her, or a long slow painful death [ok maybe something quick and sexy...] because at least 2 days after the fact, she's apologized. And never it let it be said that Kitty cannot forgive and forget... well ok I can't forget, and trust me I'm still fuming mad about this and let it be known throughout the land that I still thinks she's a supercunt...

So, kudos to you Lisa Riatt for bowing to near unprecedented public outcry (and just a a heaping shit-laod of disgust) and finally have a very nice press conference in you very pretty outfit and your very pretty shoes to say, on script, that you're sorry. I don't know WHY you needed to read that off cue-cards, but hey... you did at least SAY the words... right?

And I'd just like to add this... while I know some have commented in regards to my own family's recent and ongoing issues with cancer (My Father is still in full remission status; one the Doctors said was not even possible, and so we give thanks every day). I did not mention that on purpose in my rant yesterday. Or that every other male in 2 generations on his side of the family has passed from cancer. Yes I've seen the ugly hand of cancer, I've seen how it strips away a person's dignity; day by day, taking the life out of a person. I did NOT mention it because, my disgust, my hated, my seething anger about what she said came from the simple fact that it was a loathsome, foul and reprehensible thing to say. Period. As I am sure many with no direct connection to Cancer or Heart Disease. So that she felt it necessary to tell us of her Father and Brother's loss to Cancer, albeit tragic in their own right, had no place in her apology. The apology should had been more forthright and sooner to come and been heart felt in that what she said was simple wrong. Do not play the sympathy card here Madame because it insults us all.

And for those that may think I was a little to harsh, that 'Hey. She's human like everyone else.' Yes. You're right. But the difference here is that the vast majority of people would have apologized at first light. Not waited the 2 days, the demands from Parliament, the prolific blog posts, the news reports and articles, the cue cards etc. THAT is what is truly unacceptable.

Personally I still want her removed from her post. If the Conservative Party still think so highly of her that she can remain in their Caucus, hey that's their choice; stupid, but their choice. I've written my MP, Gille Duceppe, (yea, I know lucky me!) and cc'ed the PMO with my p.o.v. on the subject and asked that she be removed, that anything less is an insult to ALL Canadians.

And just tonight I heard that more of the tapes has been released where she's bad mouthing other fellow Conservative Ministers. What can I say but Screw You Justin Timberlake... you're nothing... LISA RIATT is Bringing Sexy Back... or is that Back-Stabbing?!
Kudos to you Lisa Riatt, you Sexy Cunt.

- - - - -

Apologies to Ma for my continued profanity...

Happy Sexy Hump Day

This one is Dedicated to Natural Resources Lisa Riatt, who's having an exceptionally sexy week...

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

And you can quote me on this...


Canadian Prime Minister Stephen Harper is a DOUCHE and Natural Resources Minister Lisa Raitt is a CUNT; they're a perfect fit.

~ Misster-Kitty

Rot In Hell...

WARNING!



Ma Horton, You ought not read this....



Never in my life has an individual so pissed me off, so upset me, so inclined me to wish ill will towards them, as piece of shit Natural Resources Minister Lisa Raitt and her head honcho, Canadian Prime Steven Harper.

Why that cunt is still in a position of power, is beyond me. Why she has NOT been FIRED from her post, RESIGNED, kicked out of caucus, or yea... pardon me for fucking asking... APOLOGIZED for her comments regarding the GLOBAL Medical Isotope Crisis; let alone her comments regarding a FELLOW Conservative politician and Minister is so fucking beyond me that I don't even think the Borg could catch up to and assimilate it...

If you're not up to speed, here's a link to the long version, if you want the readers digest edition, here ya go...

On tape, which was apparently recorded "by mistake" (who ACCIDENTALLY tapes their OWN conversations?!?! Bitch please!) in January by Raitt's former press secretary Jasmine MacDonnell, Natural Resources Minister Lisa Raitt called the medical isotopes crisis "sexy", said she wanted to take credit for 'fixing it', and expressed doubts about the skills of Health Minister Leona Aglukkaq on a recording obtained by The Chronicle Herald.. MacDonnell said the isotope issue is hard to control, "because it’s confusing to a lot of people."

"But it’s sexy," says Ms. Raitt. "Radioactive leaks. Cancer."

"Nuclear contamination," says Ms. MacDonnell.

"But it’s only about money," says Ms. Raitt.

-----

No it most fucking certainly IS NOT. It's about people's Health. Their LIVES you fucking cow... their L-I-V-E-S! I see where that's a confusing subject for you though, seeing where you haven't got a soul or a heart.

Listen to me you fat, putrid sack of shit, you have done NOTHING thus far to HELP the crisis, and selling off an offline Reactor that in all likelihood will NEVER come back online is hardly helping. Allowing a national provider (COVIDIAN) of Medical Isotope Generators (not affected by the Chalk River closure because their supply comes from Europe) sell their generators to their competition's clients at a 300 to 400 % inflated cost, while at the same time DENYING their OWN CLIENTS the same generators. By not looking into reviewing the 'shut down before they ever opened' REPLACEMENT reactors for Chalk River, called Maple 1 and Maple 2, yea you cunt, you're doing a great fucking job!

I work in the industry. I see what's going on... a lot of scrambling and stress, hospitals desperate for isotope, employees fearing for their livelihood... everyday individuals worrying about their LIFE, wondering if they have cancer, heart disease etc but have to wait til god knows when for a test...

... yea, keep up the great work bitch. You're doing super. Keep on being the sexy mofo that you are...

Here's hoping you or someone you love doesn't have to go for a test right now to see if that lump in their breast, or on their skin or that pain in the stomach, or head is cancer, or if that sharp pain they get in their chest is a heart condition... No! Wait! On second thought I DO hope YOU do... because that's hawt! That's sooooooo fucking sexy. I hope you are so polluted with cancer that you fucking explode. You disgust me to my very last breath. Go on Bitch, BE the Sexiest Cancer-ridden skank you can be.

I wish for you a long, slow, painful, agonizing death. And that goes for you too Mr. Prime Minister for supporting the bitch in the first place.

Seriously, not even a fucking apology?!
Cunt.
CUNT CUNT CUNT CUNT CUNT.

Fuck! You!

Sincerely,

Shawn Ellis


ps: for the record these are things that ARE NOT sexy...









pps: these are things that ARE sexy...






See the difference?

Sunday, June 7, 2009

I love this little guy...


...just wanted to share...

Eh Oh Eh Oh, Oh Eh Oh Eh Ohhhh

Family Guy was a repeat tonight... (like I care)... anyhoo, this clip amuses more that it should...

Friday, June 5, 2009

Guess who farted?

The First Annual Mensa and Margarita Meeting of United Canadian Bloggers.


(l-r)
BobbyKatz, N@, Ma, Kitty, Santiago

Wednesday, June 3, 2009

Music...

...makes the people come together,
Music mix the bourgeoisie and the rebels
,
but most importantly...
makes the Kitty happy.

Honestly, I don't think the repeat option on my iTouch is good for my OCD. For just as I can watch most of my DVD collection again and again and again (records include watching Connie and Carla 5 tines in succession, and watching National Lampoons Christmas Vacation from 8 am til 2 am the following morning on a none-stop loop) When I find just the right song, I can listen to it in an endless loop. Picture if you will "The song that never ends" by Lambchop and company...

What has been making Kitty infinitely happy on the inside and doing it's Calgon Duty on my commute to and from the office... MOST ESPECIALLY *FROM* the office are the following songs:


-FUCK YOU, Lily Allen
Great sound, fun, camp and to the point, no shit lyrics that inspire an almost zen-like state in me...



-MY SWEET LORD, Boy George
I do love me some George Harrison, but this version adds just a slight fabulous dimension that even one of the fab Four didn't give me...



-LET THE SUNSHINE IN, Army of Lovers
Ending the debate as to whether or not I am really and truly gay.



-VALERIE, Amy Winehouse
I can only pray the gurl gets her act together and puts out MORE music.



-RELAX (take it Easy), Mika
At one time I simply could not abide Mika.. but, then I grew...



-COMFORTABLY NUMB, the Scissor Sisters
This speaks to me in ways that Pink Floyd could never do.



And a couple Albums...

-FLASHBACK, Björn Again
OMG! OMG! OMG! I've seen Björn Again in person and they were indeed ABBAsolutely Fabuous, but then they take it a step further in their album where they do covers of other artists songs as if preformed by ABBA and they bloody well rock!...
...Woman in Love (Diana Ross)
...Stop (Erasure)
...Band of Gold (Freda Payne)
...When Will I See You Again (the Three Degrees)
...A Little Respect (Erasure)
...Will You Still Love Me Tomorrow (the Shirelles)
THIS ALBUM is is musical GENIUS!... and I thank Scooter for bringing this to my attention.



-ABBA METAL (A tribute to ABBA),Various Artists.
OMFG! OMFG! OMFG! This is an album you have to hear to believe, and I can assure it it's phenomenally addictive... ABBA METAL is a tribute album of ABBA songs played by a variety of heavy metal and hard rock bands, released in 2001 by a German record label: Nuclear Blast. There is just something inexplicably enjoyable about mixing ABBA music with Heavy Metal drums, guitar and vocals... and it SO works.. THIS is was REALLY de-stresses me as I leave the office. Do yourselves the favour and search it out.. buy it, download it.. com eon over to our place if you must, but you MUST give it a chance.



-YES!, the Pet Shop Boys
I've previously commented on their first single "LOVE etc." and as much as I love the song, the album as a whole is exponentially more enjoyable as a whole.

Music.
...makes the Kitty happy.

Happy Hump Day

Monday, June 1, 2009

[Almost] White Rabbits...

Is it June 1st already?
DAMN!
I almost forgot...





Better late than never I suppose...

[Almost] White Rabbits
[Almost] White Rabbits
[Almost] White Rabbits

Coo Loo Coo Coo, Coo Coo Coo Coo...


He's like, Canadian, eh!