Thursday, October 23, 2008

Give a Hoot (Don't Piss Off Kitty)

So tonight while waiting for the bus, I was standing behind these two rather hobbit-esque women (with THE worst perms I ever did see - but that's neither hair nor there...)

What was interesting was that they were both digging through and sorting the contents of a single purse. I found this rather odd and so I just had to watch, when all of the sudden Hobbitina #1 takes a piece of paper out of the purse and throws it on the ground, while there was a trash can not 3 feet away to her left.

Instantly I am Pissed.

I bend over, pick up the piece of paper, tap H#1 on the shoulder and say, in my SWEETEST voice, "I believe this is yours. Seems you accidentally drooped it." She looks at me, gives a skanky smile and takes the piece of paper, looks at Hobbitina #2, then back to me and says, "No I didn't assadentally drop it, I threw it away." Then proceeds to throw it back on the ground, turns back to H#2 and laughs.

I bend down, pick it back up and hand it back to her saying, a skotch less sweetly, "Hmmm that's interesting because I was certain it must have accidentally fallen because if you had meant to dispose of it, you'd have used the trash can right beside you."

She takes the paper and throws it on the ground again saying 'I don't see that it concerns you, now piss off!" H#2 giggles nervously now.

Oh no she di'ent!

I picked it back again and said, "We can keep at this all day, but if you don't want to piss ME off more, you'll put the paper in the trash. Because, I'm not about to stop." and passed it back to her.

Hobbitina #2 who seems to be the Mensa member of the two of them, looks at me, then looks at H#1 and says, "Yea, Gina, maybe you should put it in the trash..."

Hobbitina #1 crumples the paper sighs and throws the paper in the trash and says, "Whatever."

I say "No. NOT whatever. God Damn Litter Bug!"

Strangely enough the hobbit girls are silent thereafter and oddly enough elect to wait for another bus.

- - - - -

I seem to be having a heavy flow week.


Ma Horton said...

I would put you on a short leash but you would probably love it too much .

Misster Kitty said...

We already have a leash for me and it's never helped... ;-)

Maria said...

You've got some balls...

Too funny.

Misster Kitty said...

I can't help myself!
I just can't!

But, come on! She didn't even have to MOVE to put it in the garbage. just sorta hafta throw it in the general direction of the trash can... unless she was blind she could get it in... and did ... finally.

Maria said...

How much to rent you for a week, so that I could bring you around with me? I could use a good laugh on a daily basis.

I wish I could have been there to see you and the hobits in action.
Was there anyone else who got to see it? Awwww man, what bus do you take... I think I need to start taking whatever bus your taking.

Misster Kitty said...

Oh yea... there were people in front of the hobbits and people behind me.. all doing their best, I am sure, to appear not to notice, but not missing a moment. It was the rout 255 alonge Cote Vertu.

btw, Hope you're family is doing ok Maria, I know it's been a rough week and a half for you/them.

Newsguy Bob said...

You, my good Kitty, are deliciously bitchy! Good on ya!

Kitty for Prime Minister, I tells ya...

Maria said...

Think I am gonna sell my car and start taking your route.

The family is doing as well as can be expected. I am not going to tell you the reaction of sonny boy and princess in detail because you will all cry. But, Princess and sonny boy were very close to their grandpa. When they were little tots and they would finish lunch my father-in-law would take them upstairs and they would nap right next to him. He was an amazing man.

This was my kids first trip to a funeral home and Princess asked me if she shakes him really hard will he wake up? Then she rested her head down right in front of him and her arm right across his chest.

She also wrote a short letter to him at church that went like this...

prociutto=italian coldcut

To my nonno,

Thank you for everything you have done for me, picking me up fom school, bringing me to the park and the dollarstore and the yummy prociutto you made.

Nonno, I am sorry for that time when you planted the tomatoes and I pulled them all out.

If my love could have saved you, you never would have died. Till the day I see you again, I love you nonno and may you rest in peace.

Ti Amo Nonno,
(then she blew a kiss to the sky).

***there was not a dry eye in the entire church and everyone started clapping***

She was so proud.

Misster Kitty said...

Well now I'm all teared up too! You've done good raising your two Maria...

Hugs to you and yours...

John said...

Bravo Shawn! Down with litter bugs! Behaviour like that needs to be stood-up to far more often!

Kevin Is The New Shirley said...

Misster Kitty: Cleaning up the world one bitch at a time.

Newsguy Bob said...

Sympathies to you and yours.
Give Sonny Boy and Princess a hug from Cyberuncle Bob. And save one for you and Hub, too.
The death of a parent is something you know is inevitable, but can never be prepared for.

Maria said...

Especially since it was so sudden.
One day we were all enjoying Thanksgiving dinner and the next day he was gone. My heart aches.

Thanks Kitty & NGB I am hoping it will get easier with time. This Halloween will be so hard on Princess as her Nonno used to come over to our house and he used to take her out trick or treating.

Jerome said...

I am with you, sir. Every time I see someone in front of me toss trash from a car window, I wish I had a tiny missile launcher to blow them up.

Someday I'll have to tell you the story of The Perkins Tampon. I have my Kitty-esque moments, too.

(The verification word s "sessent". Let's come up with a meaning and start using it.)

Newsguy Bob said...

Users of this post can all be considered sessent.