Tuesday, October 16, 2007

Dear James

You depressing, moaning Brit.
You can't rhyme for shit.

See that?
Right there?

Shit and Brit R-H-Y-M-E.

Sure I know you don't HAVE to make words rhyme to write a great song, nor will it make or break your career... but I guess, I just expected more from you.

For the record...

Simona does not rhyme with Older.
(no matter how poorly you pronounce BOTH words)

Been does not rhyme with Skin.

Simona also does not rhyme with This.

Strong does not rhyme with Gone.
(Close. But close only counts in Horse-Shoes and Hand-Grenades)

*we not interrupt this rant for to dispense a kudo*

Night DOES rhyme with Light.
(It had to happen eventually...)

*And now back to our regularly scheduled rant*

Simona also does not rhyme with Sober.
(...but they do both start with an S... so, good for you!)

Now does not rhyme with Gone.

...and finally Simona also does not rhyme with Over.

And what sort of name is Simona anyway?!?! I know people named Simon and Simone, but Simona?!?! Nope, never met a Simona in my life...

Nice way to TRY and make a name rhyme with another word. You tried to rhyme Simona four times, and in every attempt failed. Hell, even when Dr Suess makes up a word it still actually rhymes with a real word... "


Yours truly,
Misster-Witty-Kitty

ps. See... I just did it again!

7 comments:

Maria said...

That was funny!

Although, I somewhat enjoy Mr. Blunt his depressing songs are making me want to slit my wrists at times. Whats that song of his that people keep playing at funerals? If I was a singer (which I am IN THE SHOWER, when no one is listening) not exactly sure I would want to be known for funeral music.

As for the name Simona, I know a little girl with that name. Its pretty - no?

Sean Newbury said...

You nailed it Maria! His music makes me suicidal! That god-damned 'Goodbye my lover' song... AAAAAAAAAARG! I can be in the BEST mood in the world... and instantly I want to throw myself off a bridge.
Simona... I'm sure had you asked me a month or so ago if I thought the name was cute, I'd have said yes, but unfortunatly 'Suicide Good-Times James' has ruined it for me...

Anonymous said...

I'm depressed.

Wasn't Simona Mother Teresa's middle name?

Sean Newbury said...

Mother Teresa, born Agnes Gonxha Bojaxhiu.
August 26, 1910 – September 5, 1997

Nice try!
;-)

Maria said...

geeeeeeez, he's a walking Encyclopedia that Kitty.
Thats the song... good bye my lover!! ARGGGGGGGGHHHHH!

Sean Newbury said...

yea I figured that was the one... it's just so damned depressing.

HE is so damned depressing... a total downer... He's a living, breathing, walking, talking, singing wet blanket.

JB said...

Here's a little something to make you forget James Blunt ever existed:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8ThuXEDvCZk

It's a song about a boy falling in love with his clarinet teacher's daughter. Well, it's much more than that to me. It's one of my favourite songs - ever.