Told ya so...

Bye bye Kim Kardashian (STILL have no flippin' clue who the hell you are) & Mark Ballas

I'm surprised she made it this far, but you could just tell she was not going to preform any better... compared to Cloris who actually is showing improvement... not a lot mind you but she still has more moves than young wee Kim.

and it's gotta hurt standing next to an octogenarian and losing...

See ya later alligator...

ROCK ON CLORIS!
I will continue to vote for you!

Dance Ellen Dance.

It was a surprise to everyone last night as unscheduled special guest stars, (and newly wedded lesbionics) Ellen "Gotta Dance" Degeneres and Portia de Rossi danced for all to see...

Get a room already!


Seems Tommy boy is not a fan of the Lesbionics...

Tippy would be happy...

...but I am not.

Yesterday when I arrived at work I saw a dead bird on the grass at the foot of the building. A cute little thing. It's neck obviously broken by flying into the building.

Then today, four more little things.

It's that time of year when birds are migrating south.

I spoke to my Office Manager to speak to the Building Manager to ask if we can dim more lights, or better yet turn OFF the lights at night. What purpose does leaving office lights on 24/7 accomplish anyway?!

Our Office Manager said "It's for security."

I said, "Isn't that what the alarm systems are for? and the Cameras?"

She said "Well, some people work in the evening."

"At 3 in the morning?!" I inquired.

At this point she realized that I wasn't giving up... and I didn't even get a chance to talk about wasted energy and carbon emissions... heh

She said she would report this to the Building Manager. I added that they might want to collect the birds, as they will only attract rats or raccoons or god knows what else...

Seriously WHY are office buildings always lit up at night?

Anyone?

That's the way Love it goes...

Seems that Janet's (that's Miss Jackson if you're nasty) concert was cancelled last night here in Montréal... a scant 5 minutes before the concert was scheduled to begin.

Seems she fell got "suddenly ill" during Sound Check, was rushed to hospital and remained for the evening under observation.

As of posting there is no update on Janet's official website.

...I can only assume she had never tried a Poutine before... (don't get me wrong, I LOVE the stuff; me? I'm a Canadian, but she's just an American singer/dancer... it takes years to perfect eating this stuff.)

(Calls to friends in Emergency Rooms through-out the city have not yet been returned)

meow

Who's a ...



I AM!

Just doing a little bit of clean up around the joint over the next day or so...

Hope ya like...

Misster-Kitty chooses (almost)

After tonight's episode of DwtS I'm almost ready to select my favourite couple, and the ones I will vote for exclusively.

I have narrowed down my choices to either Brooke Burke & Derek Hough, or Warren Sapp
& Kym Johnson. I just want to see them do one more dance.

As for tonight they BOTH ere incredible again.

My guess is it's either Rocco DiSpirito & Karina Smirnoff or Kim Kardashian & Mark Ballas heading home tomorrow... I'm thinking Cloris Leachman & Corky Ballas are safe for another week.... I personally thought she very much improved last night! (whodathunkit) We will see.

With that in mind I likely wont watch the elimination show tonight, because the guest 'singer' is Jessica Simpson, and I simply cannot abide her and will not be a party to her continued 'career' but watching her 'preform'... I'll just tune into the last 2 minutes. heh

OH, and I have one other comment, I just want to wait til ABC posts a picture so I can back up my claim... stay tuned...

Touch of Class.

A news report today says that the family of Heath Ledger is transferring his estate to daughter Matilda Rose.

Seems Ledger never updated his will and left everything to his parents and sisters.

It's a touching, sane and ethical thing I find, that the family realizes that had he updated his will it is likely all would have gone to her anyway.

In an age of I want I want I want - gimmie gimmie gimmie - mine mine mine, this is refreshing, and indeed touching.

worth a thousand wörter

Now I'm not going to use the 'n' word here, because frankly I really do believe it diminishes the true evil of what they did... not only to the Jews, but to Gypsies, Intellectuals, Homosexuals and on and on and on...

...But what I cannot stop myself from saying after seeing a picture like this, especially considering her views on local, national and international issues...

is...



...SIEG HEIL!

I has a scared...

SNORT!

Ok I don't know why I'm focusing on Sarah Palin so much lately... it's not like I'm American and am trying to make an informed vote. (personally I'd write in vote for Dolly Parton if I COULD vote there) I think it's just because I love me some grade-A nuts and she is CHOCK-FULL!



Then add in that I'm not really a fan of David Letterman either, (ah, but then it's his writers that do the Top Ten lists not him)

I heard a tape of this Top Ten list while getting ready for work, on the radio, and it tickled me deep down:

Top Ten Surprising Facts About Sarah Palin.
(Presented by residents of Wasilla, Alaska.)

TEN
Sometimes Sarah calls John McCain "grandpa"
(Interior Designer, May-Lynn Pauling)

NINE
She stole that sexy librarian look from me
(Grasshopper Aviation Pilot, Dave Glenn)

EIGHT
Recently passed legislation to build a bridge to Funkytown
(General Manager of a Mexican Restaurant, Jerry Ochoa)

SEVEN
Does great impression of Tina Fey
(Banker and Race Car Driver, Erika Bills)

SIX
Favorite meal: moose nuggets and beaver jerky
(Private Music Teacher, Ana Hartman)

FIVE
Working on "Knight Rider" spin-off about a talking snowmobile
(Virtual Golf-Shooting Range Owner, Calvin Culverwell)

FOUR
Favorite book? "Late Show Fun Facts" -- available at fine stores everywhere
(Flight Paramedic, Steven Heyano)

THREE
Once spent a week in the hospital after attempting to put lipstick on a pit bull
(Dental Hygenist, Kathy McCone)

TWO
To improve her foreign policy experience, she recently went to the International House of Pancakes
(Deputy Mayor and Chiropractor, Kris Larson)

ONE
Only person I know who's not afraid to go hunting with Dick Cheney
(From the Wasilla Chamber of Commerce, Lyn Carden)

B-minus-0 BLAST OFF!!!

Let it be known...

...throughout the land that my erstwhile bff, (and as this photo will prove) amateur drag queen N@ Lauzon...



... is a big stinky meanie!

That is all.

Witches vs Bitches

What I really like about US politics is the candidates are soooooo much more entertaining. SCARY, but entertaining...

Case in point:

"Palin once blessed to be free from 'witchcraft'"

And I'm proud (and a little surprised) to see they actually posted my comments. Llook for "Shawn from Montréal"

GOD I love slow news days!

Here are the combatants:

WITCHES

BITCHES


Which do you fear?

I just don't get it....

I can't sleep. This is driving me mental. (ok MORE mental...) Why do the Pussycat Girls want to have boobies when they grow up?

I mean they're kinda cute, what with their blue feet and all, but seriously, what's up with that?!

I'm just sayin'...

YAY! Cloris is still on the show!

But whoda thunk it'd be Ted McGinley that was going home tonight? Not I.

And let me, for the record just say that the Jonas Brothers ought to be drawn and quartered. Lordy but there's no talent there, and they're not even cute!?!?!?

B-minus-1

Outta line

So I had to run into the Dollar Store on my lunch hour to pick up a few cleaning supplies (HEY! Don’t judge me, Why spend $5.00 plus for a bottle of Oxyclean when you can get it for a $1 ?!?!?!)

ANYhoo... I get what I gotta get then head to the cash. I weigh my options, the line with 20 old ladies or the line with one young lady and an old man... I choose the short line DUH... It’s ONE woman with a cart of 25 things or so and an old man with a bag of butterscotch candies vs a million old ladies with pretty plastic things… what would you have done?


Well as you can imagine… that was a mistake because after being in line for about 5 minutes while the lady was rung through, and while the TWO cashiers smiled and indicated for me and Old Man River to be patient (which we had been) we stood there thinking we’d be next. They finished up with the lady and then turned their signs to “Closed. Next Cash please”

EX-FUCKING-SCUSE ME?!?! It – was - on!

But before I could start, Mr Butterscotch went off like only an old man can… and I couldn’t understand a flipping word. So I just sighed extremely loud and said “JE-ZUZ FUCKING CHRIST!”

One of the cashiers looked at me and had the nerve to say “Excuse me sir, but you are out of line!”

I replied, “No. Actually, if you care to look, Me and my friend here are IN line. In the line we’ve been in now for over five minutes patiently waiting our turn. You saw us and even asked us to be patient. Well we’re no longer patient, we’re pissed. You COULD have turned the signs around before we got in line, but you didn’t Blanche. So, you’re going to pass both of us before you go for your smoke, or your lunch or where-ever it is you think you’re going.”

“Sir, I do not have to take this abuse…”

“Yes you do. And if you don’t want this to get much MUCH uglier, because I assure you it can, then you’ll ring us both through. Now.”

Amazingly we were both rung through.

When I left I said, "Have a nice day!" And I left a penny tip. :-)


Ya know, I don’t look for this shit to happen but when it does, I’m packing heat.

- - - - -

And my GOD that felt good.

To celebrate I had sushi for lunch!

There's something in the water...

...which is painfully obvious because the Celebs lately have gone total bat-shit mental...

In the latest celeb confession... Nicole Kidman is giving responsibility for her pregnancy on a RIVER in Australia.

Ok FIRST, the rivers name is Kununurra

Second if there were SEVEN women who got pregnant after swimming in that water I'd be first going some DNA testing on all them kids and find out if they all share the same father.

And third, I'd be looking for the guy that seems to be using Kununurra River as his person 'depository'.

Seriously, this kinda grosses me out!

and just in case...

...you're not up on all the other gays out there... here's a short list of others you may be shocked to know are/were homosexualists...

kd lang (shocked? me too, considering she's Miss Chatelaine and all)

Melissa Etheridge (no really! she's gay!)

Ellen Degeneres (funny AND gay? it can't be!)

Portia de Rossi (but she's pretty?! Guilt by association... and um, gay marriage)

Rosie o'Donnell (Ok, technically, she's not gay, but her girlfriend is)

Elton John (so THAT'S what the song Rocketman is all about? Hnn, I never knew!)

George Michael (and here I thought he was only a druggie?!)

the Pet Shop Boys (They have an exclusivity supply agreement to Richard Gere. heh)

Eurasure (trust me)

Lance Bass (Well obviously)

Rupert Everett (WOW! and here I thought all that refined femininity was because he was British?!)

Dolce & Gabanna (and? AND?! Dolce, ok sure! but GABANNA too!!!)

Boy George (There's something up with that name George)

Neil Patrick Harris (OMG! They got Doogie Howser!)

Freddy Mercury (well that's a given, his band's name was QUEEN, ok, fine)

Liberace (I shit you not!)

And in no particular order a few others you may or may not have heard of. This is obviously not a complete list of all the gays out there... this is more or less just to bring you up to speed a little...

Alan Cumming
Alexander the Great
Alexis Arquette
Alice B. Toklas
Andy Warhol
Angela Davis
ANT
Aristotle
ayem8e
Barney Frank
Billie Jean King
Carson Kressley
Charles Laughton
Christopher Isherwood
Christopher Marlowe
Christopher Rice
Clive Barker
Cole Porter
Colette
E.M. Forster
Eleanor Roosevelt
Federico Garcia Lorca
Francis Bacon
Gertrude Stein
Greg Louganis
Hadrian
Hans Christian Andersen
Harvey Milk
Herman Melville
Ian McKellen
J. Edgar Hoover
James Baldwin
James Dean
Janis Joplin
Jean Cocteau
John Amaechi
John Waters
King Edward II
King James I
Lady Bunny
Leonard
Leonard Bernstein
Leonardo da Vinci
Lindsay Lohan
Lord Byron
Marcel Proust
Martina Navratilova
Michelangelo Merisi da Caravaggio
Miss Coco Peru
Misster-Kitty
Mitzi
Montgomery Clift
Nate Berkus
Nathan Lane
Noel Coward
Oscar Wilde
Peter the Great
Rainer Maria Rilke
Ralph Waldo Emerson
Richard Hatch
Rock Hudson
Rudolf Nuryev
Rufus Wainwright
Saladin
Sappho
Shirley "Kevin" Heezgay
Socrates
T R Knight
T.E. Lawrence
Tchaikovsky
Tennessee Williams
the Notorious J*0*E
Truman Capote
Virginia Woolf
Walt Whitman
Whalen
Yukio Mishima

Oh shit, I almost forgot...

Siegfried and Roy and John

...maybe I just thought they were a given... there's always one or two in every group that just 'read'... ya know?

no shit!

This just in from the "Blatantly Obvious News department"...



Clay Aikin is Gay!!???!?!?!

I'm sorry I just cannot believe it! This is obviously a hate filled rumour being set forth by Michael Douglas and Catherine Zeta-Jones, oops, I mean John McCain and Sarah Palin and the Republican pary to disparage the image of masculinity and forthright heterosexuality that is Mr Clay Aikin. Shame on them! Shame on them and their political agenda.



SEE!?
He's BUTCH!

Just leave him the fuck alone!

Happy Hump Day

Lucky number 13 ?

What's this? I accurately predicted the first couple voted off this season? You so know I'm buying a lotto ticket for tomorrow nights 6-49 draw!

Say goodbye to Jeffery Ross and Edyta Śliwińska.

Maybe this serving of humble pie will resonate with Edyta this season and she'll come back next season wiser from this experience. I swear it's like she was paired with him KNOWING they'd be voted off quickly...

- - - - -

Highlights of tonight:


Brooke Burke & Derek Hough.
Wow!
WOW WOW WOW!
BRAVO!

Lance Bass & Lacey Schwimmer.
Another top notch performance.

Warren Sapp & Kym Johnson. Not as great as last night, but he's still getting my vote, as the two already mentioned did as well... same as Cloris - I'm just not ready to see her go, even though she can't dance that great, considering she's 82, I think she's doing rather well!

My guess for tomorrow night would be Kim Kardashian & Mark Ballas. She reminds me Clyde Drexler from season 4. The man had no talent, did not seem interested in even being there and it showed. OK, she''s not as bad as him but it's close. And I still don't know what the fuck she does or who she is, but I'll tell you this, it doesn't really matter 'cause she's soon gonna be packing her bags...

B-minus-2

Unbreak her heart

I don't want to say I told you so, but...

I told you so!

Back on September 2nd I said, of the Diva Braxton:

"She'll likely do well, then have a relapse of what? bankruptcy? drugs? and stay a couple extra guilt laden weeks and then be gone."

Well I knew I was good but to have predicted this would occure on the premiere episode.... In her "Lets get to know the contestants and fill the 2-hour time slot" the first words out of her mouth were "I was recently diagnosed with Microvascular Angina and so I am doing this to to show myself that I can do it... yadda yadda yadda"

Now don't get me wrong, I'm not trying to make light of her health, but shouldn't she have tried to coast a couple of weeks before dropping the faulty-heart-bomb, like say when she messed up on a dance and needed the sympathy vote?!?

Don't be wasting those votes now gurl, you did good last night!

Oh and for anyone interested I've just launched Misster-Kitty's Psychic Friends.

1-900-675-4889
That's...

1-900-MR-KITTY

Call now.

Call often.

$5.99 for the first minute. $3.00 additional minute. Minimum 5 minutes per call.

Fasten your seatbelts, it's going to be a bumpy night

...and how!

Well if this season is going to prove anything, it's that we're running out of D list capable dancers.

There were a few hits, a few so-sos and a lot of misses.

I'd be DAMNED surprised if 'comedian' (I've had hemorrhoids that were more entertaining than him) Jeffery Ross and dance partner Edyta Śliwińska make it past the first elimination tomorrow night. But then I've been wrong before...

Here's who voted for tonight, and why, but I'm not saying how I divided the 13 votes...

Misty May-Treanor & Maksim Chmerkovskiy

... but only because I want to see Maks shirtless before she gets them voted off...


Cloris Leachman & Corky Ballas



... their combined ages are 129. WTF?! OK I heart Cloris muchos and she's got a mouth on her like a stevedore, and really that's a turn on, but lord I fear she's gonna snap a leg bone and crack a few ribs before too long. I'm just not ready to see her go yet. The woman is a legend!


Lance Bass & Lacey Schwimmer



A sister's gotta look out for her family. Know what I'm sayin'? And besides I thought they were one of the two stand out performances of the night. And you just knew Len wasn't gonna like their routine, if only because they moved so fast and his eyes moved so slow that he couldn't really see them. (actually of the 3 judges, Len is the only one I respect, and he's right it was too much flash and boogie woogie, but still they kicked ass)


Warren Sapp & Kym Johnson



OK, now for me, this was the dance of the night. Man that guy is huge!... he actually made Kym look like she only had a b-cup! I was very impressed with their dance and thought for a man the size of Wyoming, he was incredibly light on his feet. And you could just tell he enjoyed himself... that smile of his said it all.

Can't wait for tomorrow night and see their second dances...

B-minus-3

tsk tsk tsk

George, George, George, now really!? When are you going to stop doing naughty things in public bathrooms?

George Michael arrested and cautioned for possession of class A drugs

- - - - -

FYI I had to use a more dated pic of GM because, quite frankly I cannot stomach to look at more current pics of him. He used to be a bit of a dish, now it looks like he drinks dish-water...

You know what today is?

Ok YES, it's the first day of Autumn, which as we all know is just a momentary stepping stone to Winter and SNOW so, yea, I'm all up in dat!

...but no! today is something far more important... something, more than snow (SHUT UP, I KNOW!) I'd far more like to 'get up in'...

MAKS IS BACK!



Maksim Chmerkovskiy
*sigh*



Dancing with the Stars starts tonight with Season #7.

And just so there's no confusion on the matter... hands off betches, Maks is mine, all mine I tell you! MINE!

B-minus-4

Yes Master.

Sit back, it's Meme-Time!

It's the Genie Meme.

First, the rules...
(we gays love rules)

· link back to your genie.
· tag anyone you like.
· you are allowed ONLY three wishes for each question, so at NO point may you ask for more wishes. if you do, you will be instantly disqualified and a plague of termites will descend upon your home. your hard drive porn files will be completely erased and replaced with vacation pics from the Harper / Bush / [enter your country's current political leader here] family (depending on which county you hail from), a thousand fleas will invade your armpits, a thousand crabs will invade your crotch, your toilet won't flush but will back up... you get the picture...


Here we go...

Gay Genie #1
(ain't he cute?)


Appearance?
· first and foremost, I want my foreskin back (AND in full working order, I just don't want it plunked down on the coffee table)
· I want Steve Kelso's body
· 20/20 vision



Gay Genie #2
(ok not so cute, but still... Gay)

Love life?
· A little more naughty-naughty
· Spontaneity
· OK, basically like a Colt/Titan/BushCreek "film"



Gay Genie #3
(Toooooooooootally Gay! Seriously, how many times was he in a dress AND kissing men?! and all the show tunes?! PLEASE!)


Global village?
· no more disease
· no more republicans/conservatives/communists/right-wing arseholes etc etc
· end to global warming / environmental issues


Gay Genie #4
(Gay: check. Genie: check)

Career?
· writer for some terribly witty show
· nobel peace prize
· singer and record only one CD that will eclipse all CDs before it. - duos with C.Lauper, A.Lennox, K.Bush etc etc etc

Gay Genie #5
(Shut up, you KNOW this is fucking GENIUS!)

Sex with celebrities?
(if I must)
· Robbie Williams
· Dave Navarro
· Colin Ferrall

Gay Genie #6
(Mekaleka-hi, Meka-hiney-GAY!)


Overall?
· Well off. (REALLY well off... I'm thinking something in the 50+ million range)
· International traveller
· Live to the age of 99



Gay Genie #8
(This is a 'G'-rated still from a little gay porn called "Wet Dream of Genie" Don't ask me how I know, just accept it and move on)

I tag:
· Mitz
· N@
· XUP

MY Genie: Why... Kevin (aka Shirley Heezgay) of course!

B-minus-5

B-minus-6

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrg!

This is dedicated to our favourite Mean Dirty Pirate: ayem8y.

HAPPY INTERNATIONAL TALK LIKE A PIRATE DAY!

(I shit you not. It's all here.)

Avast ye, matey.

Walk the plank, ye scurvy dog.

Land ho!

Shiver me timbers.

Yo Ho Ho, and a bottle of rum.

etc. etc. etc.

- - - - -

Next year I'm going to make this International talk like a butt pirate day! Now won't THAT be fun!

B-minus-7

Such a lot of fuss over a few extra S's

I'm glad to Report Shirley Heezgay is back, in her new incarnation as "Kevin" (of all names!) over at the Lisp.

Now, as soon as I saw the new name of his blog I could not help but remember a classic Buddy Cole skit where he says, in part, "Such a lot of fuss over a few extra S's"



...and I couldn't agree more...

...although in this particular case, Fuss IS indeed warrented.

Check out the Lisp, or as I refer to it (over in my links) "the lissssssssssthp"

R*A*M

After a couple days thought I've decided to make Random Acts of Music it's own Blog.

SURE I might still post the odd video on here, but for the intents and purposes of posting the songs that make the Kitty sing... well, you'll have to check that out here...

Fringe

Have you seen the new FOX drama FRINGE yet?

We’ve watched the first two episodes and I have to say I’m hooked! It’s a skotch similar to the X-Files, but I’m good with that, since I was a huge fan of that show as well. I’m a little unsure of the female lead – Anna Torv, I find her facial expressions a little heavy on the annoying side. Seriously… it’s ok to smile. And the ‘not so good’ Doctor is a little too much on the eepy-cray side – not the character himself, sure he’s a mad scientist, it’s the LOOK of the actor John Noble, bless him, he looked better when he had that ‘Ted Kaczynski’ thang going on in the first episode.

The true saving grace to the cast is the Male Lead – Joshua Jackson.

He’s Cute with a Capital Q.

We’re looking forward to the show and aside from the promised ‘out there’ plot lines, but more than that I’m personally looking forward to watching more of Joshua, Mr Jackson if he’s nasty.

OH PLEASE BE NASTY!

Happy Hump Day